Planet WTFitness

I already had a list of reasons a mile long as to why you would never catch me dead in a Planet Fitness establishment. Topping the list is that gains are not allowed. If you actually lift weight, you're thrown out. If you look "too fit", you're thrown out. God forbid you make a noise while attempting to lift weight. That's a double whammy. They'll sound this ridiculous "lunk alarm" and then throw you out. Planet Fitness has always been a place where out of shape people go to look at exercise machines and eat pizza. They pride themselves on being a "judgement free zone" yet they will judge the fuck out of you if you're actually accomplishing something. Just when I thought that things couldn't get worse, a story kept popping up on my news feed that men are now allowed to shower in the women's locker room simply by "identifying" as a female. Stop the presses! This literally was my first thought.

Spare me the "you bigot, homophobe, (insert reactionary liberal insult), etc,.. Anyone that knows me can tell you that I don't have the slightest problem with gay folks. To me, this isn't about gay or straight. To me, this crosses the fucking line. A line that propels my inner protective instinct. Frankly, I could give a shit less if my words offend you because if ever in the history of the world has there been a slippery slope, this would be it. I also don't care that I am in a small minority of people who find this not only repulsive, but dangerous. I'm not so worried about someone so woefully confused that they think they grew a cock by accident. My concern lies in that if all a man has to do to get full access to vulnerable naked women is to say "I was born with the wrong junk" then what is Planet Fitness advertising to rapists?

If you have a penis, you are male. You can "identify" as a female all you'd like but you're not.  Did you ever think during your "don't judge me" rant that got a woman banned that just maybe women in the locker room would have a problem with you swinging your willy around? But their thoughts, culture, and privacy doesn't matter, right? They are just a bunch of intolerant bigots because they have this wild notion that perhaps you should be changing in the proper locker room? They are the selfish ones, right? Give me a fucking break. The left in this country is just sooooooo tolerant of everything until it's something they don't agree with.

Do you really want to accept a strange man whipping his dick out in front of your wife, girlfriend, mom, or sister? Not this hombre. If you're a man in the women's locker room with your fucking pants off then I'm going to assume you're a rapist and respond appropriately. Tolerance be damned.

Every sexual predator from Peeping Toms to hardened rapists have a new place to conduct their criminality now all thanks to Planet Fitness and its extreme "no judgements" policy. The craziest part of it all is that vast majority of comments are cheering this dangerous bullshit on. The left is all about feminism until it's inconvenient to one of their cherished demographics. So ladies of Planet Fitness, if you plan on not canceling your membership (which I highly recommend you do so you can join a real gym) then buy yourself a nice Glock or Springfield polymer pistol and stick it in your gym bag. They are water resistant and will still fire in moisture-laden environments with good brass case ammo. I personally recommend Speer Golddots or Cor-bonds. They use top-shelf primers for guaranteed ignition. If you see a naked man in your locker room, two in the center chest mass will do the trick.